Princess Brielle!!

Brielle doesn't often get posts just about her so I decided it was time. We love this girl! She is soooo competitive, and ACTIVE, and sweet, and thoughtful and so loving! She is hilarious and of course she's gorgeous!! She has said some really funny things lately. Check the comments on the right! Though I did want to share a few little stories about her. For the last 3 months she has been bugging us to go to the "beach." We went to California in November but did not make it to the beach so I was thinking that is what she meant. I keep telling her when we go to California again we will have to go, she would argue and tell me no here in Utah. I did not get it! I am putting together our blog book and was doing some pictures from the Roy Pool and she started yelling the beach, the beach. She was talking about the Roy Pool the whole time!!!

She loves, loves, loves her Cousin Brooke and they embrace like long lost loves everytime they see eachother. Brooke recently spent the night at our house and they had such a great time. It is so wonderful to have family so close!!! I love that they will be best friends!!



Here is our silly girl doing, Yoga like Mommy! We recently started growing her bangs out and I think she looks so grown up :(((((


Brielle was "SUPER KID!" at preschool on Thursday and she got to where a crown, her ultimate dream come true, and be spotlighted. Also we got to bring her favorite book to preschool and have Mommy read it to her class, fun for MOMMY! yea! We had to fill out about 8 questions about her including What her favorite food was: Popsicle's, and What she wanted to be when she grew up: A TEENAGER!!!! OH boy are we in trouble!


I'm not quite sure what is up with the head tilt but she does it every time you snap a picture! Oh and the kissey face is a learned trait from Auntie Karrah! We love this girl and love having her in our family. She is a challenge every minute of everyday but we still love her. She has learned exactly how to irritate Dawson and he is constantly screaming a high pitch scream thanks to our Lovely Girl :) She is such a tease! In her defense when you mix David and I this is what u get!
WE LOVE U BRIELLE!

Treasure Your Children!

What I have learned over the past six months has been well a lot! I've learned a lot about the medical world most of which I care not to know but well too late. I have learned how precious life can be and how a real miracle is a "healthy child!"
I often take for granted my children even now knowing what I know. Do I make them the center of my world every minute, No. Do I make them feel special and perfect every minute, well No. Do I tell them everyday how much I love them, YES!
I am not by any means a perfect Mother, I am impatient and selfish and well tired :( Though everyday I look at my kids and marvel at them. I am amazed that my Heavenly Father has chosen me to be their Mother. I am amazed that he trusts me enough with these two wonderful spirits. I know I will probably disappoint but I will try my best. I need to be better. I need to strive to be the Mother I know I can be. I love my kids that much!
The road I have traveled the last six months has not been an easy one, has it been the hardest road possible, absolutely not. I do know that! The pediatric brain tumor world that I am now a part of is not an easy one. Brain tumors are not easy in fact if you are lucky enough to survive one you usually have long lasting complications. Mothers who I would call my friends, though some I have never really meet in person, loose their children. Mothers who I believe are much better Mothers than I am do not get more time with their children. I cannot tell you have many Mothers I have meet in the last six months whose children did not make it. They did not get the MIRACLE that is Dawson. They do not get to witness it everyday, like I do. They have to grieve and hold to past memories. Is it fair? No way but I hold to the fact that some day, we will have PERFECT knowledge we WILL understand why these children were so desperately needed.
Dawson is absolutely a miracle if you did not know his history there would be no way of knowing it! Other than the scar on his head, which I usually get asked if he fell, he has no complications. He speech is catching up at rapid speeds and he is a pure joy to be around!
I am proud to call these two beauties MY CHILDREN!
We are so incredibly blessed!

Tree House Museum!

Well we have been sick for like six weeks so there has not been much excitement around the Milius House but before we got sick we took the kids to the Treehouse Museum! They love that place as you can see from the pictures! Sorry they are so late but like I said stupid sickness house!

Valentines Day!

Well I decided that, "We QUIT Valentines!" I'm sick of holidays and celebrations! Both the kids have birthdays in November, then Thanksgiving, then our Anniversary, my brothers b-day, X-Mas, New Years, My sisters b-day, my Dad's b-day, David's b-day, my niece's b-day, my brother in-law then sister in-law the my other nieces b-day and that only brings us to Feb. 7!!! aggghhhhh. I'm tired! Plus I hate flowers! I know, I know most woman love roses, yada yada, not me, nope! Waste of money, they die in a week and there way to over priced! When David worked for a Mortuary in California he got free flowers and let me say, "I loved those!" I don't even mind when he brings me a casket spread, at least there free!! So there is not going to be fancy pictures of gifts or romantic dinners in this blog because what I was really doing on Valentines day would not make for great pictures: wiping green snotty noses, giving cough medicine to kiddos every 4-6 hours, making and remaking meals to try and get the kids to eat something, working from home while my husband was actually at work and cleaning the germ infested house! Great Valentines, right? It has been 4 weeks since David got sick and it has made its rounds through the family and it has been rough! I am hoping it is coming to an end!

Dawson got Kidnapped!

Well today my parents took my kids for the day because I am so sick that I have not been able to get out of bed for two days! At 4:45pm my Mom calls me and tells me that Dawson went out the garage and they cannot find him. She asks if David is playing a joke on them and once I explain that no he is still at work she tells me that she is calling the police and hangs up on me.
I drive straight to my parents house get there in 6 minutes and there are 3 police cars there. On the drive I am fully expecting them to have found him by now so I am not that freaked but when I get there they tell me they have not found him and the whole neighborhood is out looking!
Okay that is when freak out Kristin comes! Hyperventilating and passing out!
The cops get a call that someone has found a lost boy in Syracuse, well my parents live in LAYTON! There is no way he walked to Syracuse without getting hit by a car! They get an address and we go to get him! It was like 3 miles away! He had to have been dropped off there! He was crying and sad but overall unharmed! The police said that someone saw him in this cul de sac just wandering.
After we get him back to my parents the cops tell us the only story they can get from Syracuse PD is that an elderly couple saw him wandering in a neighborhood and picked him up and took him home then called the police! Why would they take him and not wait where they found him? Why not call the police there? Why did the police lie to us and say that he was wandering in the cul de sac!
We will never know the answers but he is safe and home!
This boy has proven again that he is on the earth for a reason and destined to do something wonderful! He lives through a brain tumor and now a kidnapping! Oh my! Never a dull moment in the life of the Milius'/Stefan's!

Great News!

The day is finally over and things went great. The MRI results were slow coming and we had to wait for 3 hours until they were ready and Dawson was quite the nightmare from the drugs but I would wait again to get such great results!
Let me break it down:
NO TUMOR, again no TUMOR!
Hydrochepalus is stable, which means there is still an excess of fluid and his ventricles are still large (that will never change) but it has not increased! YEA!
His body seems to be handling the extra fluid well over the last six months so as of right now it is just a watch and see game. At any given point his body can start to reject the excess fluid and then we would have to intervene but as of right now things are great.
I, we are relieved beyond belief. It was almost hard to hear the good news because I had prepared myself to hear terrible news, so after the shock has worn off I feel great!
Unless trouble arises from the hydro we are not set to scan again for 6-12 months. In the world of brain tumors this is very exciting news, very encouraging and comes with great optimism. :)
After such a long day everyone including Brielle, took a much needed nap!

Thanks to everyone who has been thinking about us! Now I do not have to worry for 6-12 months!

MRI anxiety!!!!

Well I am not even sure where to start with this post but here goes and I am sure I am gonna sound like a big whining baby but here goes nothing. Thursday is the day! Dawson has another 3 month MRI. I am not sure why this one is so much harder than the last one, I am not sure if they will get harder and harder to face but man! I have been dreading the month of January and let me tell you it has been awful. Just to know that Thursday could change our lives forever.
Parents all can agree that the dreaded phone call that tells you your child has been in a car accident or whatever is a nightmare that no one wants to experience right, well in a weird way his MRI's are like facing that phone call every 3 months. Things so could go so wrong or just be a close call, etc. The anxiety is awful!
The weird thing about anxiety/depression is that compliments make it worse. Like when I'm worried I hate hearing, "Everything will be fine." It is like an insult because things have been wrong before and that is all I heard. I want to yell at everyone and say until I have the results in my hand that say, "EVERYTHING IS FINE," I will think the worst. It in some way helps me prepare mentally for bad news, though I know I could never really prepare.
The month of January has been a blur trying to stay busy and put a lid on my "issues" or I will absolutely break down in sobs, which happens more times then not. I have to be very careful who I am around because I am worried that some people can see through my mask then it would be a sea of tears. I cannot wait for Thursday to be over, then hopefully we can be relieved and happy for 2 more months until we do it again, ahhh.

We will go to Primary Childrens at 7:15 in the morning, they will sedate Dawson and then start the MRI. The MRI takes about 2 hours because it is actually 2 MRI's, one with a dye or contrast in his system and one without. This gives the doctors a look at all the vessels and veins in his brain. Also the contrast will show if there has been any regrowth or new tumor forming.

As you can imagine we are going to be fasting for him and any extra prayers for him would be greatly appreciated, thanks!

I love this boy!

Brain Tumors!

This holiday season has been wonderful! We are so incredibly blessed this year and have truly witnessed a miracle. Dawson has changed our lives and so has our ordeal. I am more emotional this holiday season than I have ever been. I guess it is because we came so close to loosing our Baby Boy that I am just thankful for everyday! This year could have ended so differently. I still struggle everyday with unanswered questions, Why? How? When? Why did he live and others don't? These questions I think will always be in my mind, survivors guilt they call it. Then of course the worry but I am dealing and he is thriving! :) The purpose of this post is to start to raise awareness for brain tumors. They happen daily to normal families. No parent ever wants to hear those words trust me! Research needs to be done, cures need to be found! Here are some statistics........

Brain tumors are the:
• the second leading cause of cancer‐related deaths in children under age 20

Today, January 23:

9 families across America will learn their child has a brain or spinal cord tumor.

A mother will grieve that her instincts about her child’s health were right.

A father will allow himself to cry, but only alone in the shower.

3 families across America will mourn the loss of their child to a brain or spinal cord tumor

Friends, family and community will try to make sense of an untimely death and the unfulfilled promise of a life.

6 families across America will transition to survivorship.

A mother will be too exhausted from providing constant care to her child to simply write checks to pay bills.

A father will again adapt his day, family and life to a new definition of normal, unlike any he had previously envisioned.

In the United States, approximately 3,750 children younger than age 20 were
expected to be diagnosed in 2007 with primary brain tumors, of which 2,820
were under age 15.1

Brain tumors are the most common of the solid tumors in children, and the
leading cause of death from solid tumors. Brain tumors are the second most
frequent malignancy of childhood death.

The incidence rate of 4.5 per 100,000 children is slightly higher in boys (4.7 per
100,000) than girls (4.3 per 100,000).

American Brain Tumor Association

http://www.abta.org

Dawson's picture about a week before he got sick I know now that he was suffering with such a severe headache :(
I am not sure what I am going to do quite yet, start a support group, do a benefit or marathon (Andrea), but for now I am going to do my best to raise awareness!!!

Snow Removal!

Well Dawson loves to help David shovel the snow he thinks he is such a big boy. David of course cannot wait until Dawson is old enough to shovel it himself, by then I'm sure Dawson will hate it! Life, right?

About three things I am absolutely positive.......

First, Edward was a vampire. Second, there is part of me — and I didn’t know how potent that part might be — that wanted him to thirst for MY blood. And third, I am unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him.

I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THE TWILIGHT SAGA! I am obsessed and cannot stop thinking about it, reading the books or seeing the movie. I read all four books in about a week my kids went hungry and dirty, my husband now hates "Edward" and I am exhausted. It was so worth it!!!! I want, no I need more!
I cannot wait for it to come out on DVD on March 21st!!! I cannot wait for New Moon or Eclipse to come out! I cannot wait for her to finish Midnight Sun which is by far the best version!! Love it all!
(I know I am late in the mania but I am glad I waited because I was able to read all four at once :)