Friday, July 30, 2010

When we arrived...............

When we arrived at Primary Children's Hospital is when our world as we new it really started to change. We were brought quickly into reality. A sad reality for many families and children. Dawson was wheeled through the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit and one of the nurses remarked, "Oh he is way to healthy to be in here you must be in the wrong place." I felt relieved. Yes, we do not belong here!

We walked around to the Neuro Trama floor which by the way, you never, never want to be there! Shortly, after getting our room the Neurosurgeon Fellow came to talk to us. He said at this point all we know is that Dawson has a mass and it needs to come out. So expect to have surgery in the next 48-72 hours. He was really vague and non personable. He told us that he and his team were going to review his CT scan and then he would order more tests before we really know anything. An MRI was ordered immediately and the wait began.
The Fellow came back within 30 minutes. He had worry all over his face! He explained that Dawson was a lot sicker than he thought. His brain was severely swollen. His tumor was larger than they were told and that he could suffer severe brain damage if they did not put a External Drain in his skull put him in a medical induced coma and perform emergency surgery at 7am. He was shocked that Dawson was conscious (somewhat) and not seizing! He showed us the CT scan on the computer in Dawson's room and I almost fainted. It looked huge! To top of this conversation David was not even at the hospital yet!...I had to repeat all of this to him after he arrived. I was not there alone but having to repeat it actually hurt my insides.
Within 15 minutes they doped him up with Morphine and he held his head up for the first time in a week! Then they took him away. That was hard. He waved goodbye in his drug induced alert state and I sobbed.
Everyone was starving and we were told it would take a couple hours to finish his MRI and his drain. We ended up at Chili's restaurant where I proceeded to chew out a perfect stranger! That day my perspective on life changed! Little problems were pointless! When I heard this woman complaining about her soda not tasting right I lost it!. I told her, "My son was just diagnosed with a brain tumor, and he is having a drain but in his brain as we speak, who cares about your stupid soda!" Now I feel terrible about it but at the time I didn't care. This woman looked at me like I was insane. Which I was, and still am :)
When we arrived back at Primary Children's they were not done with Dawson. Two hours turned into about six. I was really worried because we hadn't heard anything! After, we finally got the call to come back we were told that they had an extremely difficult time getting the drain in because there was so much pressure in his brain. Also, the MRI took longer than expected because they wanted to scan his spine as well. I fell onto Dawson's crib when they told me that!
The explained that they thought based on location that the tumor might be benign but would not know until the final pathology came back. He said they would take him back at 7am and the surgery would last about 4-6 hours. They explained they would remove part of his skull, re-arrange some of his brain and get the tumor. Then put it all back together with screws and plates.
The most genius question I could come up with sobbing again, "Will he beep at airports?" Yep that's right. Will he be able to go through the airport. Lovely, I know!
At about 3am I decided since he was just laying there I was probably okay to go lay in my "Parent's Room (CELL)" and try to sleep for a couple hours.


Jill Duncan said...

Wow, Kristen! I can't imagine going through that. You are a strong person and a great mom! So, what exactly were the signs and symptoms Dawson was having that caused you to believe that something was wrong with him? I'm just curious- it doesn't hurt to know these thing!

Carrie said...

He is such a miracle baby! Talking to him at Easter, listening to him go on and on about all of his favorite sports and how his favorite food is "Top Ramen"...I never would've guessed what he went through. He really is a miracle boy!

The McKinnons said...

You are amazing!!! Thanks for sharing. It is always good for me to hear about things like this to remind me how precious life is and to not fret the small things. You are such a great mom and so in tune with you kids and their needs.

Anonymous said...

Love ya sweetie! I wish I could of been there when you yelled at that woman to see her face.

Mimi said...

Oh my gosh, I read everything you wrote and I am crying. That was such a horrible time for you. You were so strong although I know you were dying inside. I love you for being such an incredible mother.

Your children are such a blessing to me. I adore and love them so.